Unseen and Unheard, Yet Always Near

Those we love don't go away; they walk beside us every day.  Unseen, unheard, but always near.

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Well so much for my mother not visiting me in dreams, I saw her last night – however from what I remember we were just sitting there chatting; so there was no surprise "poof" I am here where she showed up and scared the crap out of me.  I started updating her on everything and everyone since September:

I told her I completed the Tough Mudder in April and she replied, “I know I was there – remember?”

The Giants won the Super Bowl, I said.  She proceeded, "Yes, I know and it's amazing how history repeats itself.  That was such a fun night; we had a great Super Bowl party - even the 'iggles' fans were supportive, it was very strange they kept saying 'this one is for you Kathy' like who am I, haha!"

I told her about Paul Andrew's graduation and again she replied, “Yes, I remember, how could I forget that trek to Virginia, it was a nice ceremony though, good thing we have two years before we have to go back for Michael's graduation from tech."

I proceeded to tell her about daddy being in the hospital and she said, “Oh remember that? all the back and forth to Kennedy, then HUP and then the physical therapy rehab, it was exhausting, but only your father and anything for him.” 

Kaitlyn’s been texting you!  My mom replied, “I know and I meant to tell you about that as I think my phone is broke; every time I go to text her back the letters don’t show up – almost like they are invisible, it’s very strange, but I hope she is getting my replies.

I said I think John-Paul had a nice birthday and she was like, “Yes, it was such a nice day – we love the Bonefish Grill, he and I go there all the time.”

Then she looked me in the eyes and said, “What’s with all the reminiscing, you okay?  And why do you keep touching my face and arm?

I said "no reason."  

She then said, “Oh just got an e-mail for cheap airline prices to Europe, I setup a ticker to alert me so let me go research as May will be here before we know it and I am happy you’re coming with us – it will be a great time!”

I then woke up.

Based on the conversation, I don’t think she realized that she had passed away.  And I kept touching her face and arm because that is the first thing I did when I walked into her room that day and it was cold to the touch, yet in my dream she was warm to the touch and I kept touching her to make sure. 

It was a very classy appearance on her part; I guess she is always around within me so I better be good and not “misbehave” 

The 'SUN'

"I was waiting so long for a miracle to come and the world thought I had it all, but I was waiting for you." - Celine Dion 

On June 20th 1979, my mother and father arrived from New York to their new home in New Jersey.  My mother was seven and a half months pregnant and assumed her role as she always did of director – ordering the movers, her mother, brothers and husband to get the boxes in and unpacked as this baby will be here in less than two months.

Apparently a nosy little seven and a half month old in the womb heard that comment and had to see what all the fuss was about and my mother went into labor and they were off to the hospital where she gave birth to her ‘SUN.’  Although premature, John-Paul turned out to be a happy healthy baby boy and after a week in the hospital, they arrived back in Blackwood where their new home had quickly grown by two feet.

My grandmother welcomed my parents and her first grandchild as she worked effortlessly the entire week to unpack the essentials and stuff the rest in the attic, basement and garage – all of which I am still unpacking and cleaning out to date.

The ‘SUN’ was the best baby anyone could ask for; rarely cried, got right on a solid sleeping schedule and was an absolute joy to be around so three years later there was no hesitation when my mother told my father they were expecting their second child.  His initial response was “wow, what a surprise, but we seem to have this parenting thing down pat – look how great John-Paul is.”  My mother agreed and said, “Yes, the best ‘SUN’ ever, this little one shall be the same joy.”

Two years later my parents found themselves looking at each other and stating simultaneously, “If she was born first than she would have been an only child.”

Eh, I was born on mischief night, what do you expect?

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‘SUNNY’ barely made it through grade school, however my mother took a deep breath before receiving the first quarter report card from high school and was relieved and very proud to see straight A’s.  He continued that way and eventually graduated with his PhD. from Drexel University.

His accomplishments, responsible action and dedication to his family deserve to be commended.  My brother and I are both alike and different in many ways, but we complement each other very well as we actually always got along and never had that sibling rivalry; the equation was very simple – I tortured him and he sat there and took it and I still try my best until this day :->

All joking aside, we meshed and always took care of will continue to take care of each other; that will never change.

Thirty-three years ago today the world was blessed with an amazing person when my mother delivered her ‘SUN’ – the center of her universe and while she cannot be here on his special day this year, I know she is shining down and smiling while bragging to everyone in heaven, showing pictures and telling stories of her beautiful ‘SUN.’

Happy Birthday John-Paul, enjoy!