My brother and I
were going through Mother’s things after her passing. John-Paul picked up the black box and opened
the secret compartment a top. “Awe” I
heard him say as I turned around to find a tear streaming gently down his
face. He handed me the box and I looked
in the secret compartment only to find it filled with baby teeth. My Mother kept everyone of our baby teeth in
the secret compartment of the black box.
It was a
bittersweet moment for both my Brother and I so I decided to lighten things up
as I replied “Mommy was the tooth fairy?”
We both laughed
with happy tears and my brother said, “She was a great woman who wore many
hats.” I agreed and began to reminisce
of the agonizing pain of when I lost my baby teeth.
My first one was my
left front tooth. I remember it wiggling
and playing with it all day wondering when it would come out so I could get my
money from the tooth fairy. We sat at
dinner and I barely ate as I kept wiggling the tooth. My father, infamous for one line zingers said
to me “If you want that tooth out so bad I can tie a string to it and the other
end will be on the door knob and when I slam the door shut, poof the tooth will
pop out.” That sounded painful and a
chill went down my body just thinking about it.
I declined his
generous offer and just kept wiggling with my tongue. I went to sleep that night and my Mother told
me, when the tooth is ready it will come out.
I lay in bed still
wiggling when all of a sudden I felt the tooth hanging by a string. This is it I thought to myself as I pushed my
little glasses up on my face and took a deep breath as I yanked the hanging
tooth right out of my mouth. Yay I will
get money tonight as I jumped out of my bed and knocked on brothers door
screaming “John-Paul, wake up I lost my first tooth.” He was not amused and rolled over to go back
to sleep. Forget him I thought, I will
have more money than him as I scurried downstairs to tell Mommy and Daddy. I quickly knocked and then busted through
their bedroom door screaming and holding up my tooth. “Look Mommy and Daddy, my tooth came out can
we leave it for the tooth fairy tonight?”
Sure my Mother
replied as she went to her closet and pulled out a miniature sized pillow with
a little pocket in the front to place the tooth. I remember that pillow well, it was checkered
with yellow and white and the little pocket had a duck sewed onto it. My parent’s brought me back up to bed and we
placed the mini tooth bearing pillow under my bed pillow. My Mother then said, “You lost a tooth late
at night and the tooth fairy probably started her rounds so you better fall
asleep fast so she can come tonight, remember she only comes only if you are
sleeping.”
“Okay” I replied as
my Mother took my little glasses off my face and placed them on my nightstand
and tucked me in. They both kissed me
goodnight and I was off to dreamland.
I awoke the next
morning and immediately searched under my pillow and found five dollars! I am rich! I am rich! I screamed as I knocked
on John-Paul’s door and then busting through and waving my money in his face. He was not amused and rolled over to go back
to bed. He is just jealous I thought as
now I am a millionaire and he is not. I
ran downstairs to show Mommy and Daddy.
“Wow,
congratulations my father replied – you can pay the bills this month.” I giggled and replied “silly Daddy that’s
your job.”
We all laughed and
my mother said “we can go to the bank and deposit that into your bank account”
I had already spent
the money in my head on hard candy and bubble gum from the Mr. Bulky candy
store in the mall, but I liked my Mother's tactic to save my money and have her
buy me the hard candy and bubble gum on her dime.
After breakfast, my
Mother and I went to the bank. Mother
filled out the deposit slip and as we approached the counter she held me up so
I could hand the teller my slip and million dollars. Before the teller could speak I said “That is
money from my first tooth I lost, do you want to see?” Not really giving her a choice if she wanted to see or not I leaned over the counter with my mouth
wide open pointing to the empty space in my mouth. “Congratulations” the teller replied, keep
saving she said and interest on the account will maximize your money so you
have more.
We deposited my
millions and were on our way home.
Interest I kept
thinking to myself as I secretly counted the remaining baby teeth in my mouth
and at five bucks a pop, I will never have to work a day in my life. I smiled and began working on my right front
tooth.
It took me a while,
but a few weeks later my right front tooth finally popped out.
It was bedtime and
we placed my mini tooth pillow under my bed pillow and I was off to bed
dreaming of my mansions and Corvettes that I would be able to have with my tooth
fairy money. I awoke the next morning
ready to collect my million dollars once again only to find A DOLLAR?!?!
What a cheapskate I
thought to myself as I marched downstairs to demand an answer.
I sat at the
breakfast table lamenting to parents of how cheap the tooth fairy has
become. “Can you believe her” I said to
them. ”She went from five dollars to one
dollar, who does that?”
My Mother chimed
in, “Well the last tooth was your first tooth so she probably gave you a little
extra for the special occasion.”
"Do
you think it will be a dollar going forward for all of my other baby teeth?” I
asked.
My Mother replied,
“I would imagine so.”
I sat there
thinking how this threw a big wrinkle in my interest amortization
schedule. I went from tooth fairy money
plus interest on five bucks a pop to billionaire and now I had to recalculate
and adjust. Just then my Father spoke
“And when you get your wisdom teeth out, you’ll have to pay taxes.”
Taxes, I forgot
about them and at this rate I will have to get a job when I am older and at
that moment my plan had been foiled.
