The Black Box

My brother and I were going through Mother’s things after her passing.  John-Paul picked up the black box and opened the secret compartment a top.  “Awe” I heard him say as I turned around to find a tear streaming gently down his face.  He handed me the box and I looked in the secret compartment only to find it filled with baby teeth.  My Mother kept everyone of our baby teeth in the secret compartment of the black box. 

It was a bittersweet moment for both my Brother and I so I decided to lighten things up as I replied “Mommy was the tooth fairy?”

We both laughed with happy tears and my brother said, “She was a great woman who wore many hats.”  I agreed and began to reminisce of the agonizing pain of when I lost my baby teeth.

My first one was my left front tooth.  I remember it wiggling and playing with it all day wondering when it would come out so I could get my money from the tooth fairy.  We sat at dinner and I barely ate as I kept wiggling the tooth.  My father, infamous for one line zingers said to me “If you want that tooth out so bad I can tie a string to it and the other end will be on the door knob and when I slam the door shut, poof the tooth will pop out.”  That sounded painful and a chill went down my body just thinking about it. 

I declined his generous offer and just kept wiggling with my tongue.  I went to sleep that night and my Mother told me, when the tooth is ready it will come out. 

I lay in bed still wiggling when all of a sudden I felt the tooth hanging by a string.  This is it I thought to myself as I pushed my little glasses up on my face and took a deep breath as I yanked the hanging tooth right out of my mouth.  Yay I will get money tonight as I jumped out of my bed and knocked on brothers door screaming “John-Paul, wake up I lost my first tooth.”  He was not amused and rolled over to go back to sleep.  Forget him I thought, I will have more money than him as I scurried downstairs to tell Mommy and Daddy.  I quickly knocked and then busted through their bedroom door screaming and holding up my tooth.  “Look Mommy and Daddy, my tooth came out can we leave it for the tooth fairy tonight?” 

Sure my Mother replied as she went to her closet and pulled out a miniature sized pillow with a little pocket in the front to place the tooth.  I remember that pillow well, it was checkered with yellow and white and the little pocket had a duck sewed onto it.  My parent’s brought me back up to bed and we placed the mini tooth bearing pillow under my bed pillow.  My Mother then said, “You lost a tooth late at night and the tooth fairy probably started her rounds so you better fall asleep fast so she can come tonight, remember she only comes only if you are sleeping.” 

“Okay” I replied as my Mother took my little glasses off my face and placed them on my nightstand and tucked me in.  They both kissed me goodnight and I was off to dreamland. 

I awoke the next morning and immediately searched under my pillow and found five dollars!  I am rich!  I am rich!  I screamed as I knocked on John-Paul’s door and then busting through and waving my money in his face.  He was not amused and rolled over to go back to bed.  He is just jealous I thought as now I am a millionaire and he is not.  I ran downstairs to show Mommy and Daddy. 

“Wow, congratulations my father replied – you can pay the bills this month.”  I giggled and replied “silly Daddy that’s your job.” 

We all laughed and my mother said “we can go to the bank and deposit that into your bank account”

I had already spent the money in my head on hard candy and bubble gum from the Mr. Bulky candy store in the mall, but I liked my Mother's tactic to save my money and have her buy me the hard candy and bubble gum on her dime. 

After breakfast, my Mother and I went to the bank.  Mother filled out the deposit slip and as we approached the counter she held me up so I could hand the teller my slip and million dollars.  Before the teller could speak I said “That is money from my first tooth I lost, do you want to see?”  Not really giving her a choice if she wanted to see or not I leaned over the counter with my mouth wide open pointing to the empty space in my mouth.  “Congratulations” the teller replied, keep saving she said and interest on the account will maximize your money so you have more.  

We deposited my millions and were on our way home. 

Interest I kept thinking to myself as I secretly counted the remaining baby teeth in my mouth and at five bucks a pop, I will never have to work a day in my life.  I smiled and began working on my right front tooth. 

It took me a while, but a few weeks later my right front tooth finally popped out. 

It was bedtime and we placed my mini tooth pillow under my bed pillow and I was off to bed dreaming of my mansions and Corvettes that I would be able to have with my tooth fairy money.  I awoke the next morning ready to collect my million dollars once again only to find A DOLLAR?!?! 

What a cheapskate I thought to myself as I marched downstairs to demand an answer. 

I sat at the breakfast table lamenting to parents of how cheap the tooth fairy has become.  “Can you believe her” I said to them.  ”She went from five dollars to one dollar, who does that?” 

My Mother chimed in, “Well the last tooth was your first tooth so she probably gave you a little extra for the special occasion.” 

"Do you think it will be a dollar going forward for all of my other baby teeth?” I asked.

My Mother replied, “I would imagine so.”

I sat there thinking how this threw a big wrinkle in my interest amortization schedule.  I went from tooth fairy money plus interest on five bucks a pop to billionaire and now I had to recalculate and adjust.  Just then my Father spoke “And when you get your wisdom teeth out, you’ll have to pay taxes.”

Taxes, I forgot about them and at this rate I will have to get a job when I am older and at that moment my plan had been foiled. 

Three Boards

We have all heard the line Quality vs. Quantity, but how many of us learn that to be true as one of the greatest thoughts to live by.  My personal experience of the idea was at my first Karate tournament.  It was at the Tropicana casino in Atlantic City, my parents, brother and my cousin Paul were all there to watch me compete. 

My first competition was breaking.  I had practiced my routine for months and would be breaking one board with a chop followed by an ax kick breaking two boards.

As my age and belt group was called I knew I was ready! 

That is until I saw six other women walk up with their stacks of boards.  I panicked and pulled my buddy Rommel (a Black Belt) to the side and said “Mel, I need more boards, everyone else has like seven, eight and nine boards.”  He told me not to worry and to go out compete just like I had practiced. 

I was last up to compete out of the group and sat while watching the others setup with all their fancy boards as I looked at my little stack of three boards. 

It was finally my time to shine so I setup my routine, introduced myself and asked permission from the judges.  This is it I thought to myself as I chopped through one board turned around and broke through the last two boards with the ax kick.  I bowed to judges and turned around so they could give their scores and saw my cousin Paul gave me a thumbs up. 

I turned back around, bowed to judges and then lined up with other six ladies as we awaited the results. 

I stood there staring at three trophies – first, second and third place.  They announced third place and then second place and I didn't take either.  I thought to myself great, I probably won’t even place with my three dopey boards, but my thoughts were interrupted as I heard Master Giacobbe announce “First place goes to Danielle Vermitsky.”

I was thrilled and shocked to say the least, but made sense as I was the only one who broke all the boards on the first try.  The other ladies took at least two tries and some didn't even break all the boards they had.  You see, performance was based on proper form and execution all in one try. 

I still have those three dopey boards, which are now six halves and often look at them as a reminder of a lesson well learned – Quality not Quantity.

The Waiting Room

I was at the eye specialist this morning and as I was sitting in the waiting room; across from me were this little old lady and her daughter.  The older lady said to her daughter “how much longer, we've been here for hours?”  The daughter replied, “We just got here and the doctor will see you when he is ready.”  The older lady replied “when will that be we've been waiting for hours.”

Much of their conversation continued on like that where the older lady kept asking similar questions like a two year old for the next five minutes.  I couldn't help but laugh as a tear streamed down my face realizing I was jealous of those two.  As my name was called, I got up and smiled at them both and then looked the daughter in the eyes and said, “Your Mother is quite the gift, enjoy her.”

As I walked away, the older lady said to her daughter “You hear that, I am a gift now maybe you’ll answer my damn question and tell me how much longer?”  

Happy Moment

"Where are you?"

"Here"

"What time is it?"

"Now"

"What are you?"

"This Moment”

As I troll through Facebook this morning, I see numerous posts about The New Year and how some folks were glad to see 2012 go and how 2013 is going to be better. 

So I am sitting here wondering what is so magical about the clock striking midnight.

There is nothing new about today that was not new about yesterday other then the fact that we were given new moments to live with and take advantage of.  The more important question is what you did with those moments yesterday vs. the new ones today.  I would venture to say that the posts I read this morning will be posted next year again and by the same folks.  It is important to realize that the clock striking midnight on the birth of a new year will not change anything as it is up to the individual to take advantage of the moments they are given as a gift, not a guarantee; key point – gift not guarantee.

So with this new moment upon us, I encourage all of you to answer the above questions honestly for yourselves and take advantage of the Here, Now and Moment and realize that each one is a special opportunity.  

The Family Heirloom

Twelve years ago My Mother received a dollar store Santa Clause figurine for Christmas from an acquaintance of hers.  The figurine was marked down to 50 cents as the bright orange price tag sticker was still on the piece.  My Mother gracefully accepted the gift with gratitude and thanked the woman, however her wheels started turning. 

That week following Christmas we celebrated with the Virginia folks, my Mom’s Brother Paul, Aunt Maryann and the cousins Paul Andrew, Michael and Gregory.  Present time came and Aunt Maryann was last up to open and at the end, my Mother said “Oh Maryann I have one more for you, hold on.” 

My Mother came back with a beautifully wrapped box and Aunt Maryann opened it with excitement.  As she unwrapped and opened the box she held in her hand the 50 cent Santa Clause figurine.  She was speechless and was not sure whether to say thank you or not, so my Mother broke the silence and told her the story and my Mother said “just a little gag gift for you, Merry Christmas.”

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The following year we gathered with the Virginia folks for our annual Christmas celebration.  My Mother sat and peeled through the bag of presents from Aunt Maryann and crew and at the very bottom, wrapped in tissue paper was the greatest gift of all; the 50 cent Santa Clause figurine, price tag sticker still attached and all.  And so the ‘Family Heirloom’ was born. 

Every Christmas, the figurine was passed back and forth between my Mother and Aunt Maryann, it became tradition. 

Last year, after the sudden death of my Mother and with father in the ICU at HUP I was not really in the Christmas Spirit, but alas we had the Virginia crew for the annual celebration.  Present time came and I opened mine and at the bottom of the bag was the infamous 50 cent Santa Clause figurine and yes the price tag sticker lasted all those years and was still prominent.  It brought a smile to my face and I began to plot the return of the Santa. 

Last night we had Christmas Eve here at my “Palace” and the Virginia crew came out early for the first time in over 21 years.  We had a great night, everyone actually like the soups I made (as per tradition) and it was now present time and my present debut was closer and closer!       

Aunt Maryann sat down and opened this oversized box where she found a beautiful red Waterford Crystal box.  My Uncle Paul said “Oh wow, she dug deep into those pockets this year” and then Aunt Maryann replied, “Oh my God, I think I just thought of something”  "Yeah, I think I just thought of something."  She continued to open and screamed with joy “I knew it, I knew it as soon as I saw Waterford.”

So The Family Heirloom has been passed back to its rightful owner.  Stay tuned for my reaction next year! 

Merry Christmas!  

Those Multiple 'Ring Ring' Moments

It was at least forty seven times a day (on average) that I would call my Mother and vice-versa.    We would chat; I always called to let her know I got to work safely every day (was always a concern of hers for some reason, LOLOL), etc. 

Many calls were just to say hi and hear each other’s voices.  Every night we spoke to say good night and squeeze in that “sleep tight, I love you” moment. 

Often I called for no reason at all and found my mother catching on and answering the phone and saying either “WHAT?!”  or “Speak oh great one” or if I was really pestering her that day my call was answered with just “SPEAK.”

I remember the very late night calls during football season on the occasional Thursday, Sunday or Monday night games when the Philadelphia Eagles played.  She always went to sleep before the end of the late night games, but could not get a full night’s sleep without knowing the final score so she would call me late at night or early morning and ask “did those ‘beagles’ lose?”  I would always answer honestly and say “yes!”  She always replied, “Good, sleep tight, I love you.”

Of course not every call was a joy ..

There was that one call in December 2009 where I checked in to let her know I had a ‘little’ car accident, she asked where I was and I was honest in saying “oh you know just sitting upside down on the expressway.”  She was not amused.

Less than a year later, May of 2010 she called me at 4:02AM stating “I can’t breathe; I think I have pneumonia, should I go to the hospital?”  I was not amused.  

Thankfully those above two calls ended on a happy note, my flipped car was totaled, but I was not and walked away not even a scratch and after over a week in the hospital with double pneumonia, my Mommy came home and all was well :-> 

We continued our phone call routine daily, much of those conversations were about nothing at all and everything at the same time as we heard each other’s voices and that was simply beautiful. 

September 3, 2011, late at night we spoke to each other and shared our “sleep tight, I love you” moment.  That was our very last phone call.

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Every day I still grab my cell phone to call Mommy just to say hi, let her I know I arrived safely and hear her voice.  Her cell and home phone number are still programmed as ‘Kathleen Vermitsky’ and will remain that way.  I always stop myself and smile instead as I know she is watching over me and knows my where abouts and no doubt helped me arrive safely where ever I go :->  

A Childhood Remembered During A 26.2 Mile Journey

“Nothing is ever really lost to us as long as we remember it.” - L.M. Montgomery

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At the sound of whistles blown and gunshots fired in the air, we were off like thousands of ants running out of an ant hill we flooded the boards of Cape May New Jersey.  We continued along Ocean Drive, over 4 drawbridges through the fishing port of Lower Township onto the Wildwoods and along the full length of the boardwalk and then through Middle Township on into the island communities of Stone Harbor and Avalon finishing in Sea Isle City.

The wind was fierce as the sand was blowing and clung to the sweat on my skin with every mile accomplished.  My mind drifted as I began to reminisce of visiting each shore point with my family when I was younger.  The smell of fudge and Johnson’s popcorn, the taste of Curley’s fries, Mack and Manco’s pizza and Shelly’s chocolate ice cream.  A few more miles down as I continued my reminiscing remembering the sounds of laughter, sea gulls, amusement park rides, arcade games at Gateway 26 and of course my whining and screaming “daddy carry me” after we walked the full length of the Wildwoods boardwalk and had to venture back.  That few mile stretch from the crest to the north end seemed longer than the yellow brick road journey from The Wizard of Oz as my legs were short at four years old and I was tired, so after much pleading with a few tears shed daddy did carry me all the way back.

More miles down as I continued to remember the sights, sounds and feelings of visiting the shore points when I was younger.

As I approached the final mile ultimately crossing the finish line, I sit here writing reminiscing of the greatest sight, sound and feeling of my times at the Jersey Shore.  The sight was my Mother excitedly waving to me, the sound was her voice yelling “yay Danielle” as she clapped and the feeling was the hug we shared after completing my first 26.2 mile journey.

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This past weekend, Hurricane Sandy devastatingly took away most of those shore points and early September 2011 when my Mother passed she left countless folks devastated, but no one could ever take away the memories encountered, shared, loved and remembered.  Times of devastation bring upon unwanted and scary memories, but also bring hope and opportunity to regroup, rebuild and create new memories and happy times.  Each memory whether it be happy or devastating offer a message and just like the few mile stretch of the Wildwoods Boardwalk as a little kid, the possibilities and opportunities are endless and we must never forget what was, but simultaneously anticipate with excitement of what will be.